Play it again (or not, its up to you)

There is this group on Facebook called the '30 day music challenge.' I love music, but after reading the rules I decided not to participate. Because I'm too indecisive and the day 1 rule caused a impulse of neuron feedback only experienced by kids stupid enough to try and get their kite down from a power pylon. So here is my version, its shorter, unstructured and I might sneak in a few swear words.

I just can't pick one singular song as my favourite, its like trying to pick your favourite strand of hair or ass cheek. So here is a few I will always grab to break the silence. 'Everyday is exactly the same' by Nine Inch Nail. NIN will probably pop up a few times in this list but I love this song because we all can sympathies with the lyrics about a life that seems to repeat it self. 'Frances farmer will have her revenge on Seattle' by Nirvana. Like most spotty, moody teen tear aways I found my angst perfectly transformed into music in the form of the album in utero. This song often gets over looked but I love the fact it sounds like a practice there is such a thing as over producing. And 'I am the walrus' by The Beatles a song of complete nonsense with almost Dali style lyrics, again this gets over looked well the whole album gets over looked because of it being more of a sound track for the film then an album but I love it, and even with the possibility of being stoned to death, dare I say I like this album more then 'Sgt peppers.'

One song always manages to put a smile on my face even when its a really shitty day, and has me singing out loud is 'flagpole sitta' by Harvey Danger. If you read the lyrics, this song is very depressing but the delivery of those lyrics is just the best, very up beat and its the theme to Peep show.

Back in the day I used to spend a lot of time in Cornwall body-boarding and there is one album that reminds me of those hazy days in the sun sitting on the beach or around a BBQ burning sausages while waiting for the swell or driving the coast road from Newquay to Padstow. 'Glow' by Reef. Every time I hear 'Consideration' I can almost taste the salt water. Not to sound like Neal Smug from Smug town USA but I've seen more bands live then I can recall one that stands out is Damien Rice. Ok so he's not a band but when I heard the song 'Me, My Yoke and I' live I was blown away this singer song writer had more intensity then most heavy bands I have seen, real hairs standing on end time. The song is not one that gets played a lot like 'Cannonball' or the 'Blower's Daughter' but I love it, I'm also partial to 'Rootless Trees' and 'Coconut Skins'.

There are hundreds of songs I could mention but I don't want to turn this into a bloody epic so I'm going to condense the rest into a quick blast few lines. Nine Inch Nails, 'Hurt' because when everyone in Birmingham Academy was singing this soft confession of a song it was simply amazing. 'The End' by The Doors no big reason I just like it same as 'Paint it Black' by The Rolling Stones, 'Transmission' by Joy division, 'Can't dance to disco' by Feeder, 'The Passanger' by Iggy Pop, 'Pure' by 3 Colours Red, just really well written songs. Etc, etc, etc, (the list is never ending).

Writing or: how I stopped wasting time and learnt to love the cattle prod.

I stare at the computer screen like a moron trying to decipher the tear here message on a packet of digestives. The courser blinks mockingly as my brain slowly comes to a stop. This happens to me all the time, because for a while now I have wanted to be a writer. Not for the fame or even the money, even through I could do with the money. I just want to create something, something I can sit on a shelve and let it gather dust, something I can look at in years to come and think, at least I didn't spend all that time on Facebook. But I have a problem, I lack self motivation. I can have a cracking idea, have it all planed out in my head, characters, locations, plot twists, even the name of the dog. I set about writing but something goes wrong. The saying goes 'we all have one good book in us'. I believe I do, but at the moment the only way to get it out would be to crack open my head and feed on the sweet nectar inside. There are novelists like James Patterson who quite possibly cough up books on demand. I think he has a team of writers locked away in a basement, rewarding them with sun light for every 100 pages, just check out his back catalogue. I have tried this but it does come with a few draw backs. Apparently the writing zombies do need food and water and sometimes they do fight back in horrible, horrible ways. I digress, I think the problem comes when I over think what I am writing, not in the plot or the story it's self but I can and have sat in front of the computer deciding what style to write in and get nothing done. So what do I need to do? Well I could get someone to transcribe from tapes, but who has the time and patients to do that or and I think you will all agree this might be the best and most productive way, is to buy a bloody big cattle prod and have someone sit behind me jabbing away everytime I take my hands off the keyboard or avert my eyes from the screen. I could even go as far as install eye clamps like A clockwork orange. Maybe just maybe I would finely get the story I've had in my head for years about the isolated small town that gets cut off by a snow storm and discover something very strange in a field. Or the story of a man who's in a horrendous accident and ends up trapped in his own bloodline, I would love to get these out into the real world and onto paper, I could go on but I won't, I've called Jenkins to fetch the car, I'm going shopping for a prod.

Flying Skateboard?

Where is my flying skateboard? A question we have all asked at one point or another. Come to think of it where is my holiday home on the moon and the giant invading bugs from outer space? Ok so maybe not the last one, but the other stuff is differently missing. Anyone who knows me will know I'm a geek, anything to do with the future and what people think it will bring has me dribbling like a rabid dog. Everything from the computer game Fallout, which is set in a very grim post-apocalyptic world. Playing it is like being repeatedly smacked in the face with a 1950's idea of the future that has been printed on the side of a charred leg of pork. To Threads which has to be the most depressing TV program ever made. Half way through you will be hoping for a real nuclear attack, just to lighten the mood. But its not all war, radiation, famine, disease and burning northerners, there are also more tech advanced visions. Back to the future 2 promised us self drying clothes, flying cars and hover boards. There was a long running rumour that the film makers had in fact designed a real working hover board, but these were later dismissed due to it being a load of bollocks. Even TV lied to us about how good the future was going to be, remember Tomorrows world, well I do and I'm not happy TV used to be a friend, but it lied. My point is with all these visions from Deathrace 2000 to Space 1999 why is it that I'm living in said future and our biggest day to day technological masterpiece is an iphone with a spirit level app. By now I should be woken up by my robot butler, before I spray on a suit. Then I would take my breakfast pill (2 eggs over easy, crispy bacon, toast and coffee white 2 sugars) before I get into my flying car and travel to my job at the institute of Martian immigration. Is this the case, no I'm waking to a alarm clock putting on a Primark T-shirt and catching the 61 bus in the rain. In 1969 we landed on the moon, a massive achievement for mankind and what have we done since, sod all and why I here you cry from your moon base shattered dreams. It's because of health and safety. The bubble rap and germ spray brigade won't let you do anything that might cause the fracturing of a finger nail. We are being stunted by the fear that a few boffins might get a little bit blown up, boffins are ten a penny but a moon holiday home is priceless. So stop it with all the pansy arsing about and at least invent a hover board for me to fall off a few times, get bored with and throw under the bed. The future is here now pass me the death ray you deserve to be deleted.